“Mi Identidad” by Marisol Picazo

Marisol Picazo studies Human Communications, Creative Writing and Social Action at CSUMB. For Picazo, this poem is “about applying  her third root, her 3rd identity.”

Mi Identidad

I am marisol,Solecito,Sol, marii, lola,

mexikah, not Hispanic not Latina not mejicana.

I am from mi ranchito querido Guanajuat, México,

Where the smell of dirt after it rains

Promises a good crop of maiz in May.

I am from the dirty white house in east Salinas

Where the cops drive around, looking for the blue and red colors,

Where the brown neighborhood is terrified to go out and buy pan dulce

And who mutter  “ya basta a la violencia.”

I am el reflejo de nuestros antepasados,

The voices of my grandparents Esperanza and Miguel Mejia,

Who advised me to get an education

To be proud of being a brown, educated woman.

I am from long days with my ESL teacher in high school

Where the white students criticized my accent.

I am from the computers in the library of Cal State University Monterey Bay

Where otter scholars hunger to learn.

I am la vergüenza de mi padre,

De sus gritos, “a dónde vas, hija de la chingada”

And with tears would respect his decisions.

I am a necessity for my soul,

Who feels complete having an education.

I am from those cold nights in Monterey looking up at Venus

Aligning with a crescent moon.

I am la mujer de color y de mirada baja.

I am from waking up at 5 a.m. to help mom with “el lonche.”

I am the smile of my beautiful madrecita,

The woman who sacrificed all for my brother in prison.

I am los ojos de mis hermanas.

I am the lazy child for my brothers.

I am el orgullo de mis abuelos.

I am the open book for my friends,

For those who believe in the education,

For those who believe in change,

For those who are down for la causa .

I am the creation of all elements.

I am tonantzin.